when i grow up

Keep away from those who try to belittle your ambitions. 
– Mark Twain

When I think of all that I want to do with my life, all that I want to accomplish, I realize I need to stop waiting for “moments” or “somedays” or “if onlys”.  It’s not people, then, who tell me I can’t do the things I really want to do with my life. It’s me. I’m the one holding myself back.  I’m the one who is hiding myself in the shadows and telling myself that something can’t be done.

How do I keep myself away from myself, then?  I am EVERYWHERE I go! Everywhere I turn I am there. If only I could shun myself, I would. Oh, believe me I would. I would tell myself to shove it and walk away with dramatic flair, but hell, I just follow myself. 

So I just have to deal with it I suppose. I just have to let myself walk side by side with me and tell myself to shut the hell up as soon as I start talking and telling me that I can’t get something done, or get something finished or that today is just not the day.


I will start telling myself, sure why not? and, yeah I can squeeze in fifteen minutes to snap a few pictures.  And more importantly I will tell myself that I need to do this, for me.  Clearly I can’t avoid myself so I best start changing the way I speak to myself. 

There is so much I yet want to be, I can no longer look at what I was or what I should have been.  
C. Streetlights
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Published by C. Streetlights

I wrote and illustrated my first bestseller, "The Lovely Unicorn" in the second grade and I've been terrified of success ever since. Published by ShadowTeamsNYC and represented by Lisa Hagen Books

3 thoughts on “when i grow up”

  1. Jen says:

    "I am EVERYWHERE I go!" just made my day.

  2. I'm so grateful Jeanne introduced us and only sorry it took me a while to get here. (I'm @alanasheeren)

    "There is so much I yet want to be, I can no longer look at what I was or what I should have been."

    Yes…oh, yes.

  3. getting to the future you by way of the past and the now. it's a complicated path, isn't it? and it's soooo easy to write 100 times "i will not belittle my ambitions." "i will not belittle my ambitions." and so on and so on. but it's a lot harder to actually do it, isn't it?

    now that we've agreed on that, let's agree that you will go with yourself willingly, enthusiastically to wherever it is you want (or need) to go, to be, so see, to do. deal?

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