It’s the day before #Reverb12 and I approach this year with much less planning than in years past. I haven’t looked at the website other than to register and I haven’t even looked at the other bloggers who are participating — yet. I am purely jumping in for the experience which is something I welcome with enormously exaggerated open arms. Without a doubt, writing every day will still be a challenge, but I hope it will end the month with eyes as wide open as I always do. And gain some new inspirations along the way.
I know I raised some eyebrows with my previous blogpost, and I’m comfortable with that. While I welcome all to linger here, I do not force everyone to stay. Although, I do think it is healthy for people to understand that sometimes even good and righteous people will not look or act like a cookie-cutter cut-out. And why should they? And if people truly believe this, even deep down where they don’t want to admit it, then perhaps I am not the one with as many problems as I thought.
I have made no secret that I am struggling right now. This does not make me a bad person. It doesn’t mean there is something wrong with me. It just means I am having a very human experience. And I will survive because I always do.
So whether I swear — or use “bad” language — or have moments where I let my passion break out, or say exactly what I mean — it really shouldn’t matter as to how that reflects on me as a person. Because I think I am a pretty good person . And I really wish I could say I was sorry if people disagree because I’m not sorry.
There is more than shades of grey in this world. There are shades of red, too. And I’ll dance in the red while the whisperers linger in the grey.
Let #Reverb12 begin tomorrow. I’m ready.
Published by ShadowTeamsNYC and represented by Lisa Hagen Books
- Recovery From Quarantine - November 9, 2020
- Inspiration in Quarantine - April 30, 2020
- By the Moon’s Light - March 17, 2020
I don’t know why I’ve never thought of this before… we should try to coordinate our visits to the old neighborhood so we can have a big hug! And I still plan to come your direction, I ended up going no where in October. 😛
Just be you. The person God designed you to be. (I happen to think you’re beautiful and fabulous, for the record.) He made one of you and you are precious just as you are. Ugly emotions and everything. We probably should’ve been talking before now because I’ve been where you are, for far different reasons. It ain’t pretty. And all I have to say is the Lord is big enough to handle my anger toward Him… He’s big enough to handle yours, too. And because He loves us with a perfect love, He loves us in spite of our anger and ugliness.
How I wish I could just give you a hug. A looong hug. And then sit and bawl my eyes out with you.
Hang in there!
I can feel your hugs all the way from Colorado, have no fear! Much love to you!
So glad that you are not apologizing. A) You did nothing wrong but live, and B) I am a firm believer in getting help when you need it…no stigma, no side-eyes. Dealing is HARD, and you are brave to work on those things that have their claws in you right now. You are a lovely person, and that transcends beyond a word choice or the truth in a post.
All of the best to you, my friend. We are cheering you on and here if you need us.
B
You are all the best cheerleaders, too. Thank you! Much love.
Girl, you rock and you know it. Much love to you.
Thanks Michelle. I might not always know it, but I have you to remind me!