healing

Healing.  What healed you this year?  Was it a sudden, or  a drip-by-drip evolution?  
How would you like to be healed in 2011?

I feel as if I have answered this already for Reverb10 as I have written about the significance of the beach and its impact on me.  I don’t really want to revisit this idea not because it troubles me but because I want to begin focusing on 2011, looking forward to what will make me whole again. Like last year’s leopard print, I have a fear of growing redundant.

I know that what will challenge me, and heal me, in 2011 will be forgiveness.  This will be the refiner’s fire.  It may very well bring me more tears than the wrongs that have been brought against me.  Yet I know that for my own heart I must do it because of all my fears, I fear most of all becoming that woman.  You know, that woman who becomes bitter and whose eyes narrows when she sees happiness in others.  Who refuses to feel and experience joy.  It terrifies me.

I recognize it might take me more than a year.  And I recognize that I don’t want to forgive people who have so spitefully hurt my family.  But like the ocean’s relentless energy, I know that whether I want life to continue or not, negative energy only affects me and not the people who have hurt us.  It is time to send it all into the deep blue and feel the water’s pulse soothe me.

It will only be through forgiveness, I know, that my family and I will be able to put 2010 to rest.  

C. Streetlights
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Published by C. Streetlights

I wrote and illustrated my first bestseller, "The Lovely Unicorn" in the second grade and I've been terrified of success ever since. Published by ShadowTeamsNYC and represented by Lisa Hagen Books

One thought on “healing”

  1. oh forgiveness is the hardest thing and the best thing all wrapped up in one. i was never good at it, but in the past few years i came to the same conclusion, i didn't want to be that woman. someone who is close to me is that woman, and never forgives anyone for anything. i see what that looks like and i don't want it to be me. you are brave and kind and you won't be that woman.

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